Service Learning with Compassion

The word "patronizing" is an interesting word.

To be "patronized" is to be looked down upon. Someone is showing their superiority and/or wealth to 'help' you, but you feel small and judged instead of being lifted higher.

But "patronized" comes from the word "patron" which has a much more uplifting meaning. To summarize from Merriam-Webster here, a "patron" is a 'supporter...one who uses wealth or influence to help a person, institution or cause". The article Getting to the Why:  Social Learning for Social Justice, read here, brings up the difficulties of encouraging service based projects in schools with grace and humility, and not superiority and judgement. 

Community Service in schools is rising, perhaps partially because of a trend in college admissions to place value on community service projects when considering applications. In Rhode Island, schools can apply to become a "Feinstein Leadership School", and to quote the patron of this program  "It means that you've committed your youngsters to reach out to do good deeds for other people. ... This is, I think, an extremely worthwhile program for the youngsters because it empowers them, it teaches them that they can reach out to help other people, that they make the world a better place, and they respond." Both the middle school my girls attend, and the school I work in, encourage community service. At the middle school, community service hours are a requirement, and at my elementary school it is encouraged through food drives.

My family had already started volunteering at a local Community Market, and we were happy to realize this would count towards the children's community service hours. I had mixed feelings about my children being helpers as people came for their free groceries. I did not want them to be spectators to other people's hardships, and I didn't want their help to be muddied with superiority. I arranged our time slot to be the last time slot of the day. We are the clean up crew who put the food back in the pantry and freezer, and break down the tables at the end of the day. But we still have late comers, regulars whom we have had a chance to meet and get to know over the years. They are all different. Some old, some college students, some people are retired, some are out of work and have moved back home for a while. Some work and still can't afford groceries. Men. Women. Disabled. Able. Black. White. Asian. Immigrant. Local. My children have made me proud. They see everyone as people first, and people who need help second. It is a difficult line to adhere to, but in the article it was explained very well:

David Kirkland of NYU wrote that, in some cases, “service learning has come to mean something equivalent to an extended and sustained field trip for privileged learners who often imagine their roles in communities as agents of salvation as opposed to agents of service.”

This notion of 'service' is such an important idea to return to. As humans we do things that make us feel good, and helping others can be a great way to feel good about yourself! However, if making yourself feel good, look good, sound good, overrides your commitment to serve others it stops being service and becomes self aggrandizement. You stop being a patron, and start becoming patronizing. 

I enjoyed this article as a real world look at teachers who were committed to community service projects, but who were also willing to analyze their experiences and share their learning. One group had gone for a walk in the neighborhood surrounding the school and the students had noticed all the trash. The students decided that focusing on the trash in the neighborhood would be a good project. Later, the teacher reflected: 

 “The walk was useful because the issues they identified are so tangible. But if I did it again, I’d start with listing the great things about the neighborhood because there are so many,” he reflected. 

That balance; seeing the good with the bad, being of service but not patronizing, seeing the need but also the person; that balance should be the goal of everyone wanting to help others.